You make an excellent point, Tara. Here's what bothers me about mental illness--it's as if we have to protect society from the reality of this illness. If someone has cancer, we can see the physical manifestation of the illness. People have to bear the reality and discomfort and, as a result, I believe have more of an understanding and empathy (look at those mirror neurons firing) because they bear witness to the suffering.

With depression, it's tricky. For me, I go through periods where it's evident things aren't "right." But there are more periods where I'm highly-functioning but feel like I'm not in my body (that dissociative state you describe). I'm not making the sort of choices I'd normally act and don't normally act how I'd normally act, and it's only when people hold up a mirror and display their discomfort and horror over how "different" I am do I realize maybe it's worse than I thought it was? Or perhaps maybe I'm tired of performing 24/7, 365 days a year.

People don't understand the depth and complexity of our illness (as it also shows up differently for everyone), so there's not as much understanding or empathy as someone who has a physical illness. Also, there's an issue with folks who misuse words like depressed, ADD, etc. when they haven't been clinically diagnosed. I've read repeatedly how people with OCD and ADD get annoyed when people use the terms flippantly because they take one element of the illness and flatten the rest of their experience. It's as if people don't know the difference between that time I was sad and a severe mental illness and the entire spectrum.

It's infuriating.

But beyond that there are times (especially this year) when I wish I didn't have a million bosses (being a consultant) because I've had to reframe and shape my persona for each person's behavior or remain flat and "happy," always-on because it's exhausting to show up as a human. I do wish I had the sort of business where I'm the boss and have only myself to answer to.

Or, I wish people would redefine what it means to be "professional" (I've come to hate that term because it's become rooted in white supremacy and patriarchy) and maybe have a bit more humanity in realizing the separation between work and life has become increasingly porous.

Here's hoping. :)

You've given me a lot of food for proverbial thought, so thank you for commenting.