You Don’t Have To Be What The Internet Wants You To Be

It’s okay to be offline, boring, or violently uncool.

Felicia C. Sullivan

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Shut off your phone. There you go. Easy does it. Let it slide out of your hand and onto the floor, and it’s okay if the case, cover, what have you shatters and cracks because there will always be new ones. There will always be repairs. Kick the phone under your bed and let it breathe there for a while Let it collect dust bunnies and lint and the socks you never seem to find. Let it buzz, let it ring, let it sing, let it burn a hole through the fucking floor because it is possible to live without your appendage. It is possible to live without. It is possible to live. It is possible.

Though — every few seconds, I find myself reaching for it. Crawling under the bed, squeezing myself and scraping my body against metal. There go the cuts, the blood — the price I pay for my wants. Always reaching. Believing the device that has only existed for less than two decades is a life raft that can save me. Be the defibrillator that can breathe life back into these old bones! I beg and beckon it. Give me fame. Give me glory. Give me love. Give me a hobby that can be monetized or Instagrammed. Rub the wrinkles from my face and whittle me down to bone so I can resemble all the other automatons on screen.

I’m kidding — I don’t want these things though the screens tell me I should want them.

Or, at the very least, make one of my old books popular again. I don’t ask for much. I keep looking at the phone thinking it will give me something in exchange for what I’ve given it.

But the phone is like waiting for Godot. Never delivering what you’re looking for, it only makes you realize your gaping need. Better to kick it under the bed again. Better to leave it there, leave the house, lock the door and walk up and down the block a couple of hundred times until the twitch abates. Until the hand that reflexively reaches settles down at your side. Pace the street all night if you have to.

The ticking that is the bomb that is your hand will cease to tick.

What I’m saying is this — I’ve lived half my life without a single screen and I can barely remember the feel and make of it. There are glimpses of it from the new kids…

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Felicia C. Sullivan

Marketing Exec/Author. I build brands & tell stories. Hire me: t.ly/bEnd7 My Substack: https://feliciacsullivan.substack.com/ Brand & Content eBooks: t.ly/ZP5v